That moment when you realize, yeah, I did teach them something

Teaching is an incredibly rewarding career...you hear that a lot. You may have also heard that it's an incredibly frustrating career, where one is constantly second guessing oneself, asking questions like: Did I teach that correctly? Did it sink in? Did I do it in the right order? Am I covering all the necessary curricular outcomes? Will they be ready for the next level by the end of this year? And the most common question: WHY AREN'T THEY GETTING IT?!?!

But occasionally, there are these little moments, these gems, that stand out and show you that you really have been teaching them something valuable all along, and more importantly, they HAVE been paying attention!

Today we had a debate in Social Studies class. We listed all of the benefits of the Canadian Pacific Railway (connected the country, improved transportation, resources, travel, communication, economy, etc.) and all of the negative impacts (the mistreatment of Chinese workers including wage slavery and deaths, etc.). They were asked this question: Do the benefits of the CPR outweigh the negative impacts? Then they had to stand on one side of the classroom if they thought yes, and the other side if they thought no. A debate ensued after the students sat and thought deeply about which side to go to (the longest I've ever seen them lost in thought). They were conflicted and tried to take middle ground but I wouldn't let them. I listened to their arguments and counter-arguments just about beaming as they spouted facts learned in class and connections from other subjects. Not only have their debate skills improved immensely, so has their critical thinking and perspective taking. I believe, it is entirely possible to teach empathy as a skill and if critical thinking and empathy are the only two things I've taught this year that will stick...well, I'd say that's still a job well done.

After our debate, we headed to the park, laughing and joking as we walked together, not as a classroom, but as a cohesive community. My student who hasn't smiled in a while decided she wanted to skip, so I started skipping with her and soon the whole class followed along, skipping down the sidewalk, collecting all kinds of stares, without a care in the world. My student was so happy, they were all so happy, which of course, made me incredibly happy. If I could collect moments and put them in a jar, this one would fill it. :)

We are often so hard on ourselves as people and professionals, and it's so easy to see all the areas that need improvement or that have come up short. (Which of course, drives us to do better next time). But I believe it's important to also take stock of all the things that we are doing right.

I have taught my students to love literature (even the boys!).
I have taught my students that stories are told to teach us a lesson, to learn something about the world, not just for entertainment.
I have taught my students that their opinions are valid and deserve the opportunity to be shared.
I have taught my students the importance of community.
I have taught my students to think for themselves, to form their own opinions, to share what's inside their head and not what's on Wikipedia (that took a while).
I have taught them that learning is fun and asking questions is what allows you to learn more!
I have taught them the meaning of the word "empowerment" and what it's like to feel "disempowered."
I have expanded their world view outside their tiny bubbles.
I have taught them that they are all important, that they matter, and they have the potential to achieve their dreams.
I have also taught them how to play "The Game" and "Telephone Pictionary" which as we all know, are lifelong skills.

I think I've done alright for my first year. I couldn't be more proud of all of them. I never want a different career. Not ever.

Why Dhaka?

Why Dhaka?

     This is a question commonly asked among the ex-pat community. The real question being, what would possess someone to choose, of their own free will, to live in Dhaka, Bangladesh? After all, it was rated the second worst city to live in by the 2013 Economist Intelligence Unit Global Livability Survey. The only city worse than Dhaka at the time of the survey was Damascus the war-torn capital of Syria.
     So why did I come to Dhaka? To be completely honest, I was tired of constantly comparing my life to those around me and having the feeling of consistently coming up short. Comparing our life to others is what we do best in North America. It drives our economy and fuels our consumerism. If we constantly feel like we never measure up, we will continue to consume goods and services trying to achieve the impossible goal. It's brilliant marketing; it's emotionally exhausting. I thought that if I were to do something completely different, there couldn't be any comparisons. 
     But as it turns out, the feeling of not measuring up still exists inside my own head no matter where I live. Perhaps it's human nature. Maybe it affects some people more than others and most people more than it should. Now that I teach middle years students, I'm brought back to that time in my life, where I constantly felt awkward, out of place and never good enough. My students struggle with the same thoughts and I find myself running impromptu after school counseling sessions discussing all kinds of sensitive issues.  There is no school counselor, no social worker, no school psychologist, nothing. Just me, doing my best to make my students feel adequate in a world designed to make them feel the opposite. The one thing I do know, is that no matter what happens in my week, no matter where I am in the world, if I know that I can make someone else's day better, that's all I need. If I can inspire someone else to be their best, to reach their full potential, that is the greatest joy. 
     So I don't have life all figured out yet, but I'm beginning to think that is not a thing that ever happens. What I am learning, is how top live in the in between, dealing with all the pain and all the joy that comes my way and sorting out which feeling to wear that day. 
     An illustration: Monday morning we didn't have any school, my room mate and I walked to a busy intersection with a box of crackers and granola bars and handed them out to people walking through traffic, begging for money. They called their friends, their friends called their friends, and within 5 minutes it was all gone. With smiles on everyone's face, we walked away. We didn't solve anything. Those people are still living in poverty while we live our lives of luxury next door. But for a few minutes, we brightened their day with a few treats and them humbled ours as we watched them share among each other, making sure the man in the wheel chair, who couldn't get to us fast enough, still got his share. 
     So I can either feel depressed and helpless at the fact that I cannot single handedly bring these people out of poverty, or I can feel joy at brightening someone's day. To be honest, I feel both, and i think that's a good thing, because discontent drives us to change what it is that we don't like, and finding joy in the little things keeps us hopeful enough to believe that change is possible.  

Train rides, fresh air, and tea plantations

This has been a year of firsts. First teaching job, first time living in Asia, first time being away from home for 10 months, first time riding an elephant, first time surfing, first time volcano boarding, and last weekend I had my first experience on a Bangladeshi train. That was adventure and a half.

The crowd gathering in the train station

All the staff at CTS wanted to get away for the weekend. So our lovely French teacher organized a trip to Srimongal, also known as the tea capital of Bangladesh. We arrived on time for the 4:15 pm departure but of course the train did not arrive until close to 5:30 pm. While waiting with our large crew of 22 people, (most of us being foreigners), we began to draw a large crowd. I've lived in Bangladesh for the past 6 months so I'm used to people staring. But I suppose I don't spend a lot of time being stationary outside with a large group of friends so I'm not used to men closing in around me on all sides and pulling out their cameras as if I'm in some kind of freak show. No smiles. Just blank stares...but not even blank, more like angry stares as if I am being condemned for something and I have no idea what. Well, a few of us got tired of being gawked at so we thought maybe two can play this game so we decided all at the same time to turn and face the people staring at us and stare right back at them. A few people laughed, most kept their steady gaze which just made me more uncomfortable because I can't stare at strangers right in the eye for long periods of time, I was brought up believing this to be incredibly rude.

Andrew and I trying to keep the crowd at bay

We then decided to play a little game that went like this: Every time someone pulled out their phone to take a picture of us, we would put our phone in front of their face and take a picture of them. Again, a few laughed, but most just kept moving their phone to get a better picture of us while we were moving our phones in front of our faces to prevent them from taking a picture in the first place.

Death stares

The picture game

Then the train comes...and the mayhem beings. I have to run, push, and elbow to make sure that I get on the train because it only stops for 5 minutes and even though we have tickets; it's a free for all in this country. Most of us get on the train before it starts moving, a few jump on just in time and feel like rock stars. But then the battle for our seats begins. People are yelling, threats are made, the train is stopped and won't move until there are apologies (really? people have the power to do that?) and eventually we get going with most of our seats reclaimed and a few members of our group sitting/standing in the aisles.

The train...up top is free!

It's like a roller coaster riding the train in Bangladesh, only with a greater chance of derailment. Taking the train feels a bit like playing Russian Roulette. It's really exciting to actually make it to your destination in one piece.

Riding our bikes through the rice paddies

But the destination was so worth it. I could breathe again! Fresh air! I saw green for the first time in months! I walked through the jungle and heard monkeys calling to each other, I rode a super sketchy bicycle through rice paddies, I took a nap in a local fisherman's boat as we glided along through the wetlands, I saw for the second time since coming here, that Bangladesh is indeed a beautiful country.

 

Jungle Walk

Nap time!

Beautiful Landscape

Tea plantations look like a green carpet covering tiered hills. It's beautiful to walk through. The tea is delicious to drink. But there it is again, that reminder that the world is not always what it seems, that our desire for a cheap delicious drink comes at a cost to human dignity. The workers on the tea plantations are essentially slaves making less than 50 taka a day, that's less than $1 USD a day. They are a tribe taken from Northern India way back in the day that continue to live and work in Srimongal because the plantations provide them room and board and, earning so little, where else are they going to go?

  

Tea plantations

It's a very strange world we live in. We know certain things to be wrong and yet we go along with it anyways because we can't think creatively enough to do things any differently. We condemn slave owners of the past but say nothing about wage slave owners of the present. What's the point of teaching history if nothing ever actually changes?

Mother Language Day

February 21st: International Mother Language Day is a holiday that I never before celebrated but intend to continue celebrating from here on out. A grade 12 student at our school decided that CTS should have a celebration because this is the most important holiday in Bangladesh.

The history behind the holiday, as explained to me by my grade 7 students, (and verified by a UN sponsored website) is that when Pakistan separated from India, Bangladesh was a part of Pakistan known as East Pakistan. In 1952, Pakistan decided that Urdu would be the only official language spoken and people were not allowed to speak Bengali. Students at the University of Dhaka led a protest and the police opened fire killing 4 students. Eventually Bangladesh became it's own independent country with Bengali as it's official language and every year they honor the martyrs who gave their life to protect their language and culture. In 1999, the UN declared Mother Language Day an international holiday because all people should have the right to speak their mother language and celebrate their culture.

Our names in Bangla (Bengali)

This was a pretty cool holiday and historic event to learn about as I am in the middle of teaching my Grade 7's about assimilation and the colonization of Canada. They definitely connect to the importance of preserving one's culture and being allowed the choice to assimilate to a new culture or not.  

Student drawing mendi (henna) on my hand

Look at those crazy beautiful designs!

So myself and another teacher assisted the students in organizing a day long event including traditional singing and dancing, learning how to write our names in Bengali, showcasing art projects, getting henna tattoos , facepaint, and kareoke...who knew that was a Bengali tradition?

It was a great day for school wide community building and we pulled it off-barely-but that's how things are done here-last minute and chaotic. But even with all its imperfections, everyone had a great day and it was all worth it. Especially for moments like this...

Rocking out to Bruno Mars...or One Direction...one of the two.
And all in traditional dress: Shalwar kamiz, punjabi, and sari  

  Pretty sure our students think we are the coolest teachers ever...wouldn't you?